A video journal about my particular journey through life.
Let it be insightful for you, if it feels right.
It’s a given that you go fishing to catch fish. You don’t go fishing to see the scenery or to prepare your tackle.
With life you can tell yourself all sorts of stories. In a way, you are catering to all your tendencies built on what has seemed possible and impossible in your life. You are nursing all of your believed in inadequacies with your views on life. You might have a philosophy that “I am here just to see what God delivers to me.” In that case you can be pretty sure that God won’t deliver any fish. To catch fish you have to do what is right and what works for each situation. You have to be the major player in your own discovery process.
Some things are really basic. If your hook is not in the water, or doesn’t have bait on it, you are not fishing. What percentage of the time are you preparing your line, fixing your tackle or changing your position, and how much time are you really fishing? Your life is right here, but for many we are convinced that we need to prepare some more in order to live. We need to follow teachings and listen to “pointers” in order to live life correctly.
Some fishing is done with floats, sometimes called bobbers. When a fish is checking your bait, he is moving your float around. That is your hint that something is happening in life. Let’s say that we have found a great teacher whom we want to emulate. They have a sure fire method and they guarantee that you will progress through different levels of deepening experience. But you will never never catch a fish by watching someone else’s float, or reciting someone else’s pointers. You must watch only your own line to be fishing. You must focus on the subtleties of your own life to discover something new. (Read More)
The way most people function includes landing on some strategy. A simple example: when you're overworked you want to spend some time relaxing and slowing down. And when you get bored you look for something to do again. Let's look at it as a strategic dance, in which you adapt your identity to the situation. When you're dancing so fast that you get too many images and too much intensity, you slow down a little; when you stagnate you yearn for more movement.
Maybe looking for wisdom is also a strategic dance? Then your identity could use a wisdom that suits your needs for the moment. That's the strategic wisdom that I want to focus on for now.
Let's look at how you can influence your rhythm with strategic wisdom. When you're going very fast and you're feeling intense, you try to slow down. From strategic wisdom you could look for a pointer to a resting place, like acceptance or awareness. Then repeating that pointer to yourself is strategic wisdom that's about regaining your safety island. Oppositely, when you stagnate you try to speed up. Maybe you look for wisdom that makes you yearn, like a new meditation or inquiry technique that can bring you some new experiences. Then doing the technique over and over again is also strategic wisdom. Outwardly these two movements may seem like reasonable efforts. But there is also the possibility of a hidden payback.
Strategic wisdom always contains an element that jogs you off of balance. The hidden motives cause a split in your conscious intentions. There's also some repetitiveness in the effort to find balance with a strategy. How about approaching these off-balancing and repetitive elements with a playfulness? Click read more
The word “works” usually refers to a function to (easily) accomplish a given task. That task may be broad, like live in society, confront apparent limitations, keep a positive attitude, take care of your family and your health, or to be friendly.
1. Probably the easiest way is just to declare that life works now. That is a dynamic definition, not a static one. We’re not saying that everything is perfect. We are saying that when I look, choose, and act, those actions bear fruit. If the fruit doesn’t come then I am not blocked, but able to alter my course, look, choose and take up another more effective action. I am also able to back off of that avenue, and find other rewarding pursuits.
2. The difference between “works” and “doesn’t work” is often just a focus. We are then looking at only one aspect of the situation. But there’s something that works in everyone’s life, even if it is small. Many people complain that nothing works for them, but that can’t be true or they would be dead.
If our focus goes through a significant upward shift, we declare something is working. How big a shift does that take, and what evidence in our circumstances will satisfy us that it is true? In other words, part of that upward shift of focus is that we chose to shift focus. And part of that shift is that circumstances seemed to change enough to merit a new definition. Which came first? We usually think that circumstances will shift our focus. Can focus shift our circumstances?
True character is evidenced through your choices in a dilemma. Choice without a dilemma is a game that is not very revealing. How a person chooses to act under pressure is who he is, for all those in contact with him. Those same actions are what most often inform us about ourselves. We also might have some other imaginings about it, or reasoning as to why we do what we do. But how relevant are they if they never show up?
The greater the pressure, the truer and deeper revelation that choice gives. What I think that I really want is probably behind it all? And that desire may be orchestrated by many motivations. But after the choice has been made and the action is taken, even those motivations become irrelevant.
✓First of all, how many of us ever experience this kind of pressure? Timid steps (not) engaging with life keep that possibility very remote. Don’t get out of your safety zone.
✓Mostly we choose the same actions that the other guy chooses. For instance most companies don’t cut back on pollution until there is a law. “Everyone is doing it that way”. I’ll be the only one not looking out for myself.
✓A true choice freshly considers all the options, and/or discovers new options. Not many people are comfortable with making that level of choice. We are much better at simply doing what we did yesterday.
✓Is that a choice? Or is that just the choice to not make a choice?
What is it about life as we know it that encourages us to amputate some part of our daily experience?
✓We try to avoid our pain
✓We dismiss our annoyances
✓We compare and judge and then try to skew our lives by those judgements
✓We have a narrow field of allowed bodily movement
✓We have a narrow field of expression
✓We have a narrow field of preferred emotions
✓These are all kept in place by a variety of ideas
What are these thoughts that rope us into our corral? First we must believe that life is compartmentalized, that we are a sum of some optional parts that can be picked over, and chosen or discarded.
Does life really work like that? Or does our discarding only ensure that it becomes a permanent part of our landscape? Really even the choosing is only creating anxiety when it doesn’t look that way.
Second we unconsciously believe that another can tell us how to live. Adopted standards are our preferred judgement tools. And molding our lives to a role model is our preferred method. What do we really know about how that role model lives? We are just assuming that they’re great, aren’t we? Or if that role model is a salesman, are they trying to present themselves in a way that increases sales?
Third we have defined so many rules that block us from experiencing. Everything that we move toward, and everything that we move away from is held in our memory as a pre decision. Many of those predecisions show up as which feelings we are willing to have and which are forbidden. We have a list of what to do and where to go, and that is our limited repertoire of movement. No wonder we seem to be a “one-trick pony”. Click Read More.
The root cause of emotion and suffering may be a story of tough times that you tell yourself. It is verified, in part, by dismissing what works in life, and focusing only on what feels bad. This may be your belief, that feeling good is the reward that you give yourself after solving all of your problems. Of couse focusing on what doesn't work is a self fulfilling feedback loop. It ensures that you keep feeling bad.
Are any of us effective operating from that felt sense?
If you want to take a step to break that loop, comment below on what worked today. Thanks
I will attempt to speak of boundaries without much esoteric or hidden reasoning. If that is objected to, then I will take on the esoteric considerations later. First I will speak to the following:
a. Radical boundary issues come from perceived exploitation.
b. But even family and friends generally “want something from us”.
c. Would it be possible to be clear and put these wants out on the table?
d. Maybe I have made the trade off of intimacy for security.
e. What are the keys to keep the door of close contact open?
I think that you can have a boundary with people and with a circumstance too. If there is just too much noise and commotion, people get uncomfortable. Some people are sensitive to noises and lights and agitatedly seek a calmer atmosphere.
I have read where autistic people hurt themselves until the physical pain is louder than the buzzing or droning in their head. They just can’t take that sensation anymore. I also just talked with a very normal, even successful man who reported that when a child, he found himself cutting is arm and stabbing himself for a relief from internal and external noises.
1. But let’s just consider the boundaries between people. Something is uncomfortable about the other. The most uncomfortable is the idea that I might be subject to exploitation. That person wants something from me. Maybe they are an authority figure and can put me into a difficult situation. Maybe they are much more persuasive than me, and I am unable to hold my ground against them. Something about our two persona's is very unequal. I feel overpowered.
Here's a taste of a breakthrough discussion
Yoke of Many Distorted Principles
Propelled to Discuss Life, What For?
Analytical human mind peers at life through lenses decorated by thoughts and so called lenses not decorated with thoughts. Is there really any difference? Is the latter have the same decorations as the former, all-be-it of a subtler variety.
What would happen to our life if we didn't believe in any difference? Some part of it would be simpler, and our focus might become more complete and whole.
98 minutes of discovery on these topics. With Giri Samudra and Jerome Pindell.