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I know that the terminology of the inner child is not so popular in non-dual circles. Even talking about emotions is sometimes frowned upon. In my opinion, life gets dull if stuff like that is only seen as an illusion. It’s a valid perspective, but if it’s the only possible perspective, I actually see it as a subtle rejection. If both sides of the coin are seen, inclusion is also welcomed, also of emotions and child-like behavior. So here I want to present to you the other side of the coin, the non-separateness of the inner child.
Full text under 'read more'... also a pet home video for fun ;-)
The way I define the inner child here, is a childlike functioning of our organism. It can be a great source of creativity, and also of a painful way of functioning and self-sabotage. There is much material out there on healing the inner child, using painting and other arts, writing child stories, doing emotional work and much more. What I want to point out is that phrasing it as ‘healing the inner child’ actually still has a perspective of separation in it, because then it looks like you and your inner child are two different things. Healing is really just the seeing that there is no separation from the inner child. In my understanding the creative process, for example making drawings, is of great use in making this seeing possible.
In many of the works on the inner child, there seems to be a belief that it needs to be managed somehow. Although that might be useful for some, if it’s seen that the inner child is not separate there can be a different movement. The energy which previously went into this management can now flow into creativity.
So, here’s an interesting way of participating in a creative flow! There are many ways of accessing the inner child. One way is: think about a childhood memory where you felt really good. It can be a certain place like a playground, a book someone read to you, etc. Another way is meditatively asking the inner child what it wants (you’ll have to pretend for a moment that it’s separate) which can be anything from going to the movies to dancing. If you know what it wants you can start experiment with that, of course within reasonably limits. There are many ways of accessing the inner child, and also there are many books and websites on the subject.
So as you can see from these examples, it’s actually just like daily life, there’s a pretending part and a seeing part: sometimes pretending that we’re separate and also the seeing of oneness.
I always thought I had to choose between believing my story and rejecting it. Now I realize this story is a fantastic work of fiction. Let me explain.
From the highest perspective there is nothing but awareness, not separate from any experience. Any thought doesn’t mean much from this perspective, including a judgment on a personal story. There’s possibly not much more to say about the essence of non-duality, and hopefully I’ve properly introduced this for anyone unfamiliar with it.
If you have a painful personal story, and that’s your perspective, it is possible only staying with ‘this is a meaningless painful story, appearing in awareness’ isn’t going to bring forth a shift to a higher perspective. This can especially play if there is deep fear or rejection.
My inclination has been to reject my own story, and when I heard of non-duality I saw this as a confirmation of my beliefs. I saw only awareness as real, and any story as unimportant. Around the same time, I started to become more aware of the rejecting thoughts. For me, it was key in this process to get in touch with the body and with emotions. It was important to let these energies flow and bring some love and acceptance to them. Energetically, rejection reverses the natural flow of energy in the body so it doesn’t flow much anymore.