10 Important Advices for My Aging Self.....!!!!!
10 Important Advices for My Aging Self .....!!!!!
At 56 I am feeling my Body and Mind (Brain) Aging. Here, are some advices for my own Self :
1) Be financially self dependent in your final years. Don't depend on your children to manage last years of your life. If you are a Pensioner you are on a safe boat. Else, plan and save enough for your last part of life. This is one of the reasons why many oldsters don't give away their savings and properties to their children till their last breath. This is perfectly a genuine concern. When you don't have money, naturally you lose respect. More often, even with money you are bound to lose respect. This is quite natural.
2) As we age, we become a burden for our children. Our longevity increases due to improvement in medical science, but longevity does not mean a Quality Living. This in turn puts lots of burden to our children Financially, Physically and Mentally. We have to accept that we become a burden as we become aged sooner or later.
3) As we age, our Physical and Mental sharpness become dull. At certain point of time in our old age we become useless to our children and our advices are no more useful for them. Our advices may become irrelevant in the current world situation. This is the tipping point from where no one will seek our advice due to our mental faculties becoming blunt. We are naturally bound to lose respect. As you become aged, please understand this, become subdued and behave accordingly. As we become aged we become useless like a barren tree which do not yield any fruits.
4) Ego is really bad. Especially, for the old people ego is doubly bad. Shed your ego totally as you become more and more aged. Don't expect other to agree with you. Expect the unexpected.
5) Today's youngsters live in a more tense situation than when we were at their age. Naturally, these youngsters live in a highly competitive world, in a pressure cooker situation. Try to understand the youngster's situation and adjust to them to the maximum. Lower all your expectations.
6) If situations become unavoidable, one must be ready go and join Old Age homes to avoid becoming burden to the children.
7) Don't open your mouth unnecessarily and learn to speak very little as you become more aged. Speak 1 word in place of 10 words.
8) Avoid your appearance too much in the family interactions unless or otherwise sought. Don't show your face too much at all times to others in the family. Become some what aloof.
9) Don't pester others in the family. They may have higher priorities than attending to us. Give them enough time to attend to you.
10) Accept genuine advice from others in the family. Sometimes, we may have to unconditionally surrender and accept their advice. Go by consensus in the family. Don't be adamant.
11) Be sharp. Be capable. Be Self Dependent. Be Smiling. Be Silent. Be understanding. Take all bickerings lightly and adjust to your maximum.
12) Avoid moaning and murmuring. Avoid loud self talk blaming others.
13) Be Physically, Financially and Morally supportive and helpful to your children.
14) Don't fear death. Death is in a way Gift, dying is only a problem. Accept a honourable death.
These are the things that I have learnt, how not to be, from my 90 year aged father. He wants me and my wife to attend to him all the time and he doesn't know that he is crushing our freedom, by not allowing us to leave him alone in the house. Someone has to be with him 24x7. Myself and my wife still take care of him. I have the greatest respect for him. But, respect doesn't mean I should simply agree to his way of living. I want to lead a different kind of life in my very old days, if at all I live. My children live at far off places. I don't want to block my children's freedom when I become very old. Hence, I am reiterating these points to my own self often, so that I imbibe these qualities in me and these qualities become my nature now itself. But, my wife does not agree with all my above views. She has more Ego. She has more expectations.
Even now itself, I tell everything to my children merely as advices and leave them to decide in the family matters. I never command them. The above are only advices to my own self and may not be applicable for others.....!!!!!
In fact, WHATEVER I am writing in this forum are for my own EVOLUTION and not meant for others. May be I am Right.....!!!!! May be I am Wrong .....!!!!!